Caden Bryce

(A few hours old. (Photo by Matt Ryb)

I am a day late because my computer was being fixed, but yesterday was Caden's 4th birthday! I remember the day I found out I was expecting. It was a pretty crazy time in my life. I was battling depression, a failing marriage and then I found out I was expecting. Don't get me wrong, I was excited but scared all at the same time. Things were not great in my life. For some reason the first few months were a daze, I was sick, and spotting and stressed, but I remember clearly the day we found out he was a BOY! I was thrilled, I am not sure what happened but I instantly felt bonded to this baby inside of me! My entire outlook was changed, not because he was a boy, but because seeing him for the first time, this beautiful little peanut, it made him real and I was completely in love.

My entire pregnancy I had my mind made up that I was going to try for a VBAC. I intended to have Madison completely natural but she had other plans, haha, and she ended up as a c-section. So I was determined this time. By the time I was in my 8th month my Dr. broke the news, she said it's not going to happen. She thought he was too big to risk it, so we scheduled another c-section for March 16. And with the date set , it just made the whole waiting thing that much harder. I was so anxious , I could hardly contain myself.

When the day finally arrived it was actually snowing! Yes, in the middle of March! So we geared up and headed in. I was scheduled for 9am but didn't even go back to the OR until 12:30. Can you believe someone had the nerve to go into labor that day, and the Dr. had to go deliver another baby? Sheesh! (I'm totally kidding!!) Anyway we went back and preped for surgery and at 1:01pm my little miracle entered the world weighing 8lbs 6oz and 20 inches long! The time after the surgery was 100x better then with Madison, they knocked me out and took her to the NICU. With him I got to spend those minutes with my beautiful son in the recovery room. I was so much in love. He was PERFECT! I felt instantly that we were bonded. He was going to be a mommas boy! And he absolutely is hehe.

He is my little cuddle bug, he will sit and cuddle with me on the couch and watch TV for hours.  And I can't believe how smart and funny he is. Always making us laugh. I just can't believe it has been four years already! Where has the time gone?

Happy Birthday my special little man! I couldn't be more blessed to have you as my little boy! You are such a joy and I thank God everyday that He gave me you! I am so proud of you and I love you more then life itself! (And by the way, could you slow down a little bit? At this rate you will be a teenager the next time I blink. And I'm not ready for that  yet! :) )