When Alanna started school this year I decided it was time for me to go back to work. After considering my options I decided to go with a passion instead of a job. This weekend I attended a Doula Training workshop. It was crazy long days but it was simply amazing!
On our first day I went in completely clueless as to what I was about to learn. I saw a bunch of "hippie" chicks who were all about natural home births. Coming from where I am, I was immediately defensive. Having 3 cesarean births, I felt judged. How dare she, ya know? Boy was I wrong. Of course it was all in my head and I let my junk (that I didn't even know I had) get in the way. However I learned a lot. It was all about the basics of childbirth and an intro into the Doula world. It was such a long day I came home with a complete brain overload, completely self conscious that people didn't like me, and crashed. I was exhausted.
Saturday I had to get up at 5:30 to be there by 7:30, but I was so excited about digging into the Doula stuff that I didn't care. After about half the day learning techniques and positions and exploring situations, we got into the reality of it. We talked about the emotional side of childbirth and really that's what it's all about. Loving on the mothers and helping them to bring this miracle into the world. It didn't matter how and there was no judgement. It was amazing and so therapeutic. I left late and cried all the way home and I had no idea why.
Today was super emotional and I think today is really what tied us all up together. We were in a safe place. We could share our grief and experiences and we connected on a deeper level. We embraced each others differences and experiences, we learned about about each other. It was amazing. I feel like I've grown as a person, as a woman, and as mother. I learned so much about myself and about caring for others. It's more then just assisting a birth, it's about loving people. I really feel like not only did I learn about a really terrific program that I am looking forward to turning into a career, but I gained an entire support group of really amazing women!
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